This last month I passed a road sign in my journey of aging gracefully. The sign read Needy.
(Maybe wanty or dependent are better words for this sign post, I’m not sure.)
This Needy road sign indicates I’m unable to do something physically that I’ve always been able to do. I don’t like losing the ability to do something I love.
Last month my back went on strike
It refused to participate in Christmas decorating. In my book, that was unacceptable.
I always decorate for Christmas. To the max. My kids and grandkids expect it, especially one of my son-in-laws.
And I’d do it even if I lived all by myself. I love the cozy feeling the decorations bring to my embrace of the season.
I had to ask my occasional house cleaner, my husband and two oldest granddaughters for help. Together they got the tree up and decorated the house.
I sat on the couch and became a watcher and not a doer. I pondered my mom’s latter years.
Grace swirled together with needy
- Someone had to cut Mom’s toenails because her hands couldn’t hold the toenail clippers well enough to cut through the thick nails anymore.
- Dad did most of the shopping and cooking. My sister did the rest.
- Mom asked the grandchildren to decorate her whole house for Christmas, which was a huge and fun job.
- I helped her wrap gifts and clean up after our big family dinners, as did my sisters.
Was I becoming like that?
This thought scared me until I processed it with Jesus.
In some situations, Mom didn’t mind asking for help. In others she did.
But she handled each of them with style, grace, and few apologies.
Mom became dependent on others the older she became, yet I never viewed Mom as helpless.
Because in her spirit, Mom wasn’t helpless. She knew how to ask for help.
Isn’t this God’s design?
That the bookends of our lives are dependency and neediness?
We are born totally dependent on others and ask for help by crying.
For most of us, we navigate our elder years by learning how to ask for help graciously. And sometimes we cry too.
And all our stories between these bookends are about God meeting us in our neediness.
Thank goodness we never have everything we need without having to ask Him and others for help.
Asking for help keeps us humble—leads us to understand how needy we are—how we HAVE to depend on a God who stoops down to swoop us up in His arms and love on us.
I think a lifetime of our private stashes of pride are hidden behind our ability to get things done and be masters of our own lives.
I’m learning. Slowly. My pride stashes are being pulled out of hiding and into the light of God’s truth and love. And He expects me to handle it graciously.
My back is healing, and the undecorating has begun, but not without the wisdom of asking for help from a granddaughter and a husband.
You are needy, even when you think you’re not
Will you join me in aging gracefully?
Can we let the Lord clean out our hidden stashes of pride?
Can we learn to ask for help in a way that shows our dependency on, and appreciation for, one another?
Are you interested in learning how to age gracefully along with me? Join my legacy tribe below, because aging gracefully and how that ties into our legacies is one of the things we’ll be discussing in the months ahead.
I’d like to have some friends along with me on this journey. 🙂
(Catch you next week. At the moment, I’ve got to go find my toenail clippers.)