Holy in the Daily

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Seven Signs of a Healthy Friendship

This past week I’ve spent time with friends discussing ministry, family, and life in general, and I’ve felt closer to Jesus each time I’ve left the company of these friends.

I’ve drawn some conclusions after musing over why these friendships mean so much to me. See if you agree with these seven signs of a healthy friendship.

A Healthy Friend:

  1. Guards my positive perception of another
  2. Doesn’t assume motives—either mine or another’s
  3. Holds me accountable to my own values and God’s workings in me
  4. Refuses to sabotage any of my other relationships through gossip or criticism
  5. Doesn’t believe it is his or her call in life to “fix” me—the “fixing” is left to Jesus
  6. Knows how to laugh and have fun
  7. Expects all of the above from me

I’ve experienced my share of unhealthy friendships—reflecting the opposite of the seven things I’ve listed above. I’m sure you have horror stories of friendships you would like to forget too.

How we interrelate with each other really matters to Jesus.

He takes it personal when we communicate in ways that do not honor him or one another.

Isn’t it true that all communication, spoken or unspoken, is best filtered through the lens of the passionate love of God? What a safe way to build a positive spiritual legacy!

What do you think? Leave one word describing your best friend in the comment section below or answer these questions:

Which one of these seven signs mean the most to you and why?

Are there other signs of a healthy friendship that you’ve observed?

I’d love to hear from you.

Susan Gaddis, Helping you build a spiritual legacy

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This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. Jeanette Morris


  2. Beth Piepenburg

    Having healthy friends are so important. I have found Christians who bear judgemental words to me are really cursing me. I would rather hang around someone who can edify, encourage, and comfort. Even if they have to speak into my life some truth, how are they communicating that truth?
    Do we have to play god in our relationships? Or can we just have a genuine relationship of love, respect, and acceptance. Do we always have to agree with each other? Can we learn from each other?
    How can we speak into others words of edification, encouragement, and comfort?

  3. karen mccaffrey

    Compassion. It is great value to me in friendship.

  4. Fran Graham

    Non-judgemental. Accepts me for who I am, despite my failings = LOYAL!

  5. Anne Schroeder

    These are so true. I was able to change a toxic friendship into a supportive one after her divorce. It was worth the effort.

  6. Susan Gaddis

    That is so encouraging, Anne. It gives me hope for the restoration of friendships gone sour.

  7. Jesu Liebe

    Thanks Beth for your comments. May Almighty God bless you with genuine relationships of love, respect, and acceptance.

    I’ve discovered that without agreement over what Jesus says our relationships in many areas will have many areas of disharmony.

    Beth, may you find many friends who speak into your life treasured truths and bring edification, encouragement, and cherished comfort to you.

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