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How to Really Listen to Your Wife

painting of St Anthony from a post at Holy in the Daily

The Desert Fathers and Mothers were men and women who lived in the Egyptian desert during the early years of Christianity. While many lived as hermits and others developed monastic communities, all were sought out by Christians of the day for advice and counsel. It seems that human nature and godly advice haven’t changed much in 1,800 years.

When a man whose marriage was in trouble sought his advice, the Abba said, “You must learn to listen to your wife.”

The man took this advice to heart and returned after a month to say that he had learned to listen to every word his wife was saying.

Said the Abba with a smile, “Now go home and listen to every word she isn’t saying.”

Anthony de Mello, One Minute Wisdom

Ain’t it true! Comments, opinions, and marriage advice are welcome in the comment section below.

In Him together, Susan Gaddis

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This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. moira

    FANTASTIC advice!!!!! Works both ways too!!!!

  2. linda ruberto

    Good one Susan! Unfortunately many women use pouting as one of the primary ways of “communicating” with their husband. This leaves the man trying to guess what she is feeling.
    I learned that I needed to take responsibility for my emotions and communicate them responsibly.

  3. Susan Gaddis

    So it does, Moira, so it does. 🙂

    I discovered the same thing, Linda. I’m not a pouter, but I have been known to go into flight or fight mood very quickly. It took time to even identify my feelings before I could name them, own them, and then communicate them to Tom in a healthy manner. Thanks for the reminder. Still an area I’m growing in.

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