Do ever feel lonely and need a friend? Do you ever think you want to exit a party as soon as you walk in because you don’t know anyone?
Although I’m not sure you can “make” anyone do anything, Dale Carnegie shares six tips that will make people like you. They sound like the extended version of Proverbs 18:24: “A man who has friends must himself be friendly.”
Six Tips That Will Make People Like You
(My humble comments are in parentheses.)
Rule 1: Become genuinely interested in other people. (Get out of your comfort zone and ask the person about their life: hobbies, job, kids, favorite book, or what kind of dog they have. Find out what gets them excited about life.)
Rule 2: Smile. (Ouch! Ask my friends–I often don’t realize that my face is not in smile-mode.)
Rule 3: Remember that a person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound. (Repeating his or her name several times during the conversation will help you remember it and also give validation to your new friend.)
Rule 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. (Ask the “who, what, why, when, and where” questions like a favorite cousin would–not like your mother might.)
Rule 5: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests. (Once you know what gets a person excited about life, linger there–become a learner.)
Rule 6: Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely. (Give your undivided attention by looking your friend in the eyes, avoiding distractions, repeating his or her name at appropriate times, and give positive feed back on the topics shared.)
Sounds easy, but these six rules are difficult to remember when you are feeling shy. Try them for a few days at work and let me know if your relationships improve. Hey, you might even get a raise!
By the way, do you have a rule that endears you to folks? Care to share it with us?
In Him together, Susan Gaddis