Holy in the Daily

Blog posts to help women over 50 face their challenges with clarity, confidence, and resilience.


Join over 800 women on my email list who applaud my FREE eBooks and refreshing, actionable lessons.

How to Quiet Your Inner Assumption Lawyer

judges hammer on How To Quiet Your Inner Assumption Lawyer post at Holy in the Daily

Do you have an inner lawyer struggling to win every case presented by a negative assumption? I’ll bet that affects your time, energy, and relationships!

Our daily lives are made up of assumptions. Most of these are helpful—such as assuming the water will come out of the faucet when I turn on my shower. However, assumptions often wrongly color the way we view people and our interactions with them.

Negative assumptions will get you in trouble

Assumptions cause us to draw conclusions without adequate data. Have you ever had an argument in your head with someone without even knowing for sure that the person believed the viewpoint you are arguing against? I have.

Email is the worst—I can’t hear a person’s tone of voice or see a raised eyebrow when reading a digital note. I can read all sorts of negative things into an email, and one little typed paragraph can be misinterpreted.

To top it off, many of us tend to assume the worst rather than the best about a person or a situation. I usually think in negative directions when I make assumptions. It’s easy. I was not born with the “positive assuming” gene. It’s not in my DNA. I was raised by a lawyer and everything is automatically challenged or assumed to be negative.

Positive assumptions will keep you out of trouble

Therefore, #8 on my 2011 New Year’s resolution’s list reads: “If you must make assumptions, always assume the best of another. Whether your assumption is true or not, it makes for better communication (see Philippians 4:8).”

This is not simple. It requires that I take my self-editing skills as a writer and apply them to the conversations that take place in my head.

So, how much of your life is colored by presumptions? Any tips for avoiding the inner lawyer struggling to win every case presented by a negative assumption? Please share your wisdom in the comment section below.

In Him together, Susan Gaddis

Share this post with your friends: 

This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. Lilly Green


  2. moira

    Guilty as charged Sue!!!
    I was born with that same DNA I’m afraid!!! Our Vicar (Pastor) while speaking on this very subject a week ago ended by encouraging us to “look for God’s signature in everyone we meet”
    I LOVED that, and will be continuing to work on my preconceived ideas, presumptions and assumptions, probably till I get to Heaven…….!!!!!!

  3. Carolyn

    I don’t have any wisdom to share, but you’re so right about the assumption thing concerning emailing and even texting. Both are such common forms of communication these days and we do need to be careful. I often send off a quick email and wonder if it sounds harsh and usually don’t go back to put smiley faces or change wording just because I’m in a hurry … hopefully I don’t come off negative … I’ll have to watch that in the future and just take an extra minute or two.

    Thanks for the encouragement Susan to take extra care!


  4. Carolyn

    oops … here’s my smiley face 😉

  5. Beth Piepenburg

    Assuming you wrote this to attack me, because I wrote/said/did/looked ….. (LOL)
    e-mail or letter writing is the hardest way to communicate because there is no body language or voice tone to give us a clue. If I hadn’t put the (LOL) above, Susan might think I was blasting her. 2nd hardest is communicating by phone because body language is lacking. Maybe that is the reason to not just assume what we read into the Bible, but to be listening to what the Spirit is saying. I’ll realyl understand things so much better when I see Him face to face.
    I think it is easy to assume something because we base it on how we think, or on our limited cultural or social surroundings we have become comfortable with, or on having been taught that certain behaviors mean something when they don’t necessarily.
    Too often we assume or even worse read into what someone is saying or doing, rather than discerning from the Lord.

Leave a Reply